Kicking Stupid Self
I am not feeling like any kind of diva today.
I
am so sick of bottles. I hate them. I hate being reliant on them,
washing them, storing them, filling them.
I wish my boobs worked right.
Cutiebug's been sick and hasn't been eating well but today was especially
bad. He'd been trying to eat the same bottle for three hours and gotten
one ounce. He was coughing allot so I thought this was just the cold
getting worse... NO... It was a clogged nipple on the stupid bottle and
his idiot mother with defunct boobs couldn't figure it out and let him
suffer for three hours.
When I figured it out I changed the
nipple and he sucked it down and is all smiles. How this child can be so
loving and forgiving is beyond me. I'm not feeling it right now.
I just
want to kick myself.
In the boob.
Is your little guy your first? Really, try not to beat yourself up this hard. I totally did with my son and I really regret all those tears now that he's 18 months old. It all seems so... minor in the grand scheme of things.
ReplyDeleteWhich makes things a little messy now that I just delivered another baby. I don't feel quite the drive to work as hard as I did with #1, first of all, because I don't have the time, but also because I know he thrived on formula. Just a really healthy, happy kid, but I feel like I owe it to my daughter to try.
Anyhow - thanks for the link to your blog. I'm Anya on the IGT forums.
Hi Anya! He is my first, and I am sorry I didn't reply to you when you posted this comment. I have worked past the "kicking myself" until the next little crisis.
DeleteKnowing how hard this is, I can completely understand not having the emotional, psychological, and physical reserves to work the same way with a second baby. It would be impossible for me to do all of this with another kiddo wanting and deserving my time.
I hope things are going well with your daughter!